THE ONE & ONLY HOPE

J phoned the biologist this morning and was told that the last embryo did not survived to be cyro-preserved. Now we can only pin our hope on the embryo that is transferred into my uterus yesterday.

I am having bad rashes mostly on lower part of my body recently. I told the doctor that it might be allergy caused by the estrodiol pills I am taking but she said it was impossible. I really do not know how what had caused the rashes other than that. I am also having a really bad cough after taking some pineapple (which said to be helping implantation) last night. Well, things are not really going smoothly for me.

Anyway, I will be having another Progesterone Injection tomorrow "OUCH" and I will need to go back to the fertility clinic on Saturday to do a blood test to check on my Progesterone and Estrogen Level.

10 more days before the HCG blood test. Let's just keep our finger crossed hoping the miracle happens to us again.

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IVF - One Blastocycts Embryo Transferred

I had one Blastocycts Embryo Transferred this afternoon. If I am not wrong, only 2 out of 9 embryos survived thru the stage of blastocycts. We will need to call back tomorrow to see how the last one is going. If it survives, it will be cyropreserve (frozen). Hopefully, the one in my uterus now is the BEST embryo and make me a mummy again. I will be having my blood test on 2 Aug to confirm whether it is successful. Wish Me Lots of Lucks! :)

IVF - 9 out of 10 Embryos still growing

J phoned the biologist this morning and was told that 9 out of 10 embryos were still growing well. J requested to do the transfer today but the biologist still suggests doing it on Tuesday instead. Before J could finished the sentences on reminding her that our 9 embryos were dead last time while trying to do 5 days transfer, the biologist cut him off and told him that she knew and they had new "equipment" this time and they are doing 5 days transfer most of the time recently. So we will be calling back on Tuesday and most probably do the transfer that day!

IVF - 10 Embryos Fertilized

J called the Biologist this morning and was informed that 10 out of 12 embryos were fertilized. The biologist suggested that we can wait for 4-5 days to do blastocycts transfer but I was reluctant this time due to the last experience. I do not really want to go thru the Egg Retrieval again as it was really painful. Last time, we tried to get 9 embryos to blastocycts, most of them were growing well on the 4th day but all were died on the 5th day!! I do not want to take the risk again although I am risking myself for having twins instead. However, we will call the biologist tomorrow for further instructions.

Shannon had been crying to go to Damien house these 2 days. I said NO this morning and she went to push a chair from the dining table. She said she wanted to get the keys and open the door!!! Thus I brought her over while Serene asked me go home to take more rest. Shannon stayed happily at Damien's house till 6pm and I felt really blessed to have such a helpful friend. :)

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IVF - Egg Retrieval

Today is the Egg Retrieval Day. Luckily, Serene (Damian's Mummy) helped us to take care of Shannon for the day. I have also arranged Irene (Avril's Mummy) to help me fetch them to Creche. Anyway, I brought her to her place at 6am and went to the fertility clinic.

We did the Admission of Hospital and waited 1.5hr my turn to do Egg Retrieval. During the waiting, J went to provide his sperm sample for the eggs. I changed and went in to the operating theatre while J waited outside. I was knocked out by anesthesia soon after.

They successfully retrieved 12 eggs from my ovaries. I was feeling very cramp-y after the Egg Retrieval. I was discharged at noon and went home straight away. J went to work at 130pm after sending me back home while I slept for the day. I was kind of regret that I din ask him to take leave because it was simply painful. The pain was something like menstruation cramp but worse then it. The process of retrieving the eggs out of my bodies has created some wind inside my tummy which makes it even painful. At some moment, I had dizzy spells while I was enduring the pain. Luckily, Serene helped me to take care of Shannon till 9pm. I coaxed her to sleep right around 10pm while I waited J to come back from work as I need to take the Progesterone Injection. Damn... the needle was thick and long but this time the injection was not as painful as the one I had few days ago. I kind of force J to confirm/see the IM injection site for the information on the website and he finally admitted that he might have hit the wrong place for the last injection. T.T

We will be calling back on Saturday morning to check how many embryos have survived and will be transferring 2 embryos either on Sunday or Monday!!

IVF - HCG Triggers

This morning, we went to the fertility clinic for follow up on my IVF. Again, kenna poke 2 times during blood test. After so many poking, my left hand surrendered...the nurse couldn't draw any blood from my left hand even after several attempts of turning the needle left and right #%$#%&&*&%. Luckily, this time my right hand was co-operative or else I think they will draw the blood from my vein around my wrist.

My gynae was not around for some reasons and the other lady gynae took over. My appointment was at 930am and I waited for 1.5 hr for my turn. I did go up to the secretaries and check out when is my turn and the nurse told me the next one. However, I waited another 3 - 4 patients before my turn and those patients were not as early as me. The lady gynae must have skipped my turn to attend to her patients instead. The most frustrating part is she did not update me the growing process of the eggs. She just said: “We will trigger tonight and do Egg Retrieval on Thursday. Fine.. Really had no mood to check with her anything. After collecting some necessary documents and prescription from the secretaries, we went to MacDonald at La Teste to have our lunch.

After lunch, we proceed to the hospital to get more medicine for J. Since he will be casted till Aug 5, he will need the daily injection till then. Talking about him, he is walking on his injured leg now. Well, the doctor did say that he could start putting "some weight from this week, but he literally walks on it everyday. Nagging at him seems useless and hopefully everything will be okay for him.

At night, we realized that we forgot to ask the gynae which injection site we should do for the HCG triggers. According to the medicine instruction, we need it to inject on the buttock but I remembered that it can be done on the stomach area as well. Anyway, J did the injection on my buttock for safe sake. Damn, it was so painful... T.T I am glad that I had finished those injections but I still have to fear the long and fat needles for progesterone injection on my transfer date. T.T I wonder how I did it last time when I am trying to conceive Shannon. Maybe, I was really desperate for a baby last time....

2 Injection A Day

We went to visit the gynea on Friday. After a blood test and some examination, I was ordered to start 2 injections at night. Damn... I was so happy on Thursday night thinking that I will start ONLY the stimulation injection the next day and throw away the previous thick and long needle...Sigh... This 2 injections will last for another 12-14 days before the Egg Retrieval. Good Luck to ME! :)

Busy Busy

It had been a really busy week and there's 3 more weeks to go because J had 30 days MC instead of 10 days. He will need to go for review this Wednesday and hopefully his cast can be removed. He is using crutches now to move about but I have to serve him most of time. Ohya.. He has to take daily injections when his leg is casted so as to prevent blood clot when he's casted and he's doing the injections himself.



Now, he know how's the pain/fear like when I was going thru IVF. Talking about that, I started another round of IVF yesterday. They changed the protocol which means I would be taking daily injections for 1 month. Gosh.. I couldn't control my tears yesterday as the needle was thicker than those previously used. I get so grouchy yesterday whenever the thought of the needle going into my stomach comes into my mind. I really hope all the physcial pain and emotional stress that I'm going through would be worthwhile.

3 Months Rest

We went to see the gynea last Saturday and were told that we have to wait for at least 3 months to do another round of IVF. He said I need to take 3 months rest before doing another round of Egg Retrieval which would probably starts in May.

I am surprised when J said that we shall take the next one a LAST try. Maybe he felt I really went thru enough of injection. or maybe he really cannot stand my Mood Swing... ;p... Anyway, I appreciate his understanding. Frankly, I might be able to endure all the pain but sometimes I wouldn't be able to know when I couldn't take the failure.

I really hope the next try will be SUCCESSFUL. As for whether it will be the last try... I really don't know...

Unbelievable... T.T

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Embryo Transfer Cancelled! Another failed IVF!

None of the embryos survived! It was so unbelievable... Yesterday, we went to the clinic and was told that 6 of them still alive and going thru evolutions but not matured enough to be transferred. This morning, J called and was informed ZERO embryos survived... T.T

Both of us were speechless in the beginning. We only need ONE out of 8 embryos to evolve into blastocyst embryo but ....

"Sigh"

This is the risk we have to take for opting to do blastocyst embryos transfer to avoid twins. Maybe next time, we will just opt for 3 days transfer with 2 embryos and risk to have twins? Both decisions involve risk!! Which risk is bigger? Having Twins or having to do the whole procedure again? Arrggghhh....

Anyway, we will call up the gynea tomorrow and see what the next step is. Maybe he wouldn't let me choose next time...

TTC#2- 2 Slowing Down

Just received a call from J. He called the biologist and was told that 2 out of 8 embryos were slowing down but still developing. According to the biologist,6 embryos are developing well and have high chance to go into Blastocyst stage. However, they reminded us again that we might also have none of the embryos left to transfer if we choose to wait.

All we can do is to pray and hope that most of them will be cultured to blastocyst Stage now!

Fingercrossed!

TTC#2 - 8 Out of 9

We called back the biologist yesterday and were told that 8 out of 9 eggs were fertilised. We told them that we wanted to transfer only ONE egg and hope that it will be cultured at Blastocyst stage. .

Blastocyst Development
By definition, a blastocyst is an embryo that has divided into hundreds of cells and is composed of two parts. The outer sphere of the blastocyst is called the trophoblast. The inner portion of the blastocyst is filled with fluid. Inside the trophoblast, there is a clump of cells called the inner cell mass. The inner cell mass is the portion of the blastocyst that actually becomes the baby.

Blastocyst Transfer
Only a small percentage of embryos will reach the blastocyst stage. This self selection of the embryos allows the embryologist to pick the embryos that are most likely to produce a pregnancy. When transferrring blastocysts, it is not necessary to transfer as many embryos to maintain a high pregnancy rate. This reduces the risk of multiple pregnancy and therefore increases the chances for a couple to have a live born healthy baby.Many experts believe there is another reason for the higher pregnancy rates seen with blastocyst transfer. In a normal "in-vivo" (in the body) conception, the embryo does not reach the uterus until the blastocyst stage. If we were to place an embryo into the uterus at the 8-cell stage (after only three days of embryo culture, it is deviating from the normal body processes. That is, the 8 cell embryo does not belong in the uterus at that time. Transferring the embryos at the blastocyst stage is more "physiologic".


By choosing to have embryo culture to Blastocyst Stage, we risk to have none of the embryos survive as well. I do not want to transfer a 3 days embryos and get a negative nor I want to have 2 embyros transfer to get a twins. If none survive, I just need to go thru everything again but if kenna twins, its for life. It's not easy to raise a child in this world now with the higher living standard and competition. After weighing the pros and cons, we decided to take the risk!

TTC#2 - Retrieval Day

We reached the hospital at about 7am on Monday. J went to do the pre-admission for me and provided his semen specimen while I waited in the car with our sleeping baby. When everything was done, I went in to wait for my turn to do the Egg Retrieval.

Finally, I was called in about 15 minutes later and was asked to change into their provided clothes. Then the General Anesthesia started to knock me out. While I was still thinking why I was still awake, I was knocked out. hehehe

After awhile, I was woke up by few ppl and was pushed into the recovery room to rest. After some monitoring, I was pushed to the ward to rest. Then J and Shannon came in and we stayed till about 1130am and was allowed to go home. Ohya, we were told that 9 eggs were retrieved!

The cramping was kind of bad but still bearable. I felt that my tummy was really heavy to carry around. I think lots of air were created during the retrieval. I took some pain relieve medicine and rested the whole day.

TTC#2- HCG Injection

Had my last Gonal F injection on Friday and HCG injection last night. We did the HCG injection in a car as we are having dinner with our friends. Crazy right? hehehehe

The hCG trigger injection is one of the most critical parts of the IVF medication protocol. After the eggs have been stimulated to grow and develop, the hCG trigger is the final medication given before the egg retrieval. The hCG trigger has several functions:

-Induce final maturation of the eggs
-Cause the resumption of meiosis
-Loosen the egg's attachment from the follicle wall
-Allow for the timing of the egg retrieval

Now my eggs are "boiling" and will be "cooked" to be retrieve tomorrow morning. I hope that the Anesthesia had been booked by the secretary of Dr. Emperaire. ;p

As of last Friday, I have got 13 eggs on both of my ovaries, hopefully every eggs will be able to retrieve successfully. At the same time, J will be providing his semen specimen fresh and hot from "OVEN" to prepare for the next step.



More about Egg Retrieval


This method by which the eggs are retrieved at PFC is an ultrasound directed Needle Aspiration. The ultrasound probe with a needle guide is placed in the vagina, which allows an aspiration needle to be INSERTED through the upper portion of the vagina directly into the ovary. The ultrasound image allows the physician to accurately guide the needle into each follicle for aspiration or "suction". As the fluid is aspirated, the egg is released and collected in the laboratory. The retrieval process takes approximately 15-30 minutes."

After the eggs were retrieved, they will start the process of fertilization (the union of the sperm and egg). We are doing IVF-ICSI (Intra-cytoplasmic sperm injection ). The procedure involves injecting a single sperm into the cytoplasm of each egg using a fine glass needle because it achieves much higher fertilization rates.

Hopefully, everything will go smoothly tomorrow..

Growing Eggs

As you guys know, our making 2nd bb Project started about one month ago. I am now at the process of "growing multiple eggs" in my ovaries by having daily Gonal F injection with half a dose of synarel which started last Monday.

I went for a review last Saturday and everything goes well at the moment. There are total of 12-15 follicles @ 10mm in both my ovaries. I will need to do another few days of injection for the follicles to grow bigger (17-20mm) before the Eggs Retrieval Process.

I will be having another review tomorrow to check on the follicles sizes and at the same time, J will contribute his "specimens" for necessary actions. We had an appt with the Anesthesia as well to prepare for the Egg Retrieval and hopefully he will appear on the day of my retrieval! We had confirmed that my gynea forgot to book the Anesthesia for my last retrieval and that experience really freaks me out. I know J had been trying to make sure that I get my Anesthesia on my retrieval and I think I can trust him. ;p

IVF Procedure Starts...

Making #2 thru In-Vitro-Fertilisation(IVF) after a failed FET starts today. I am given Synarel Nasal Spray for the *Suppression stage.

*During the suppression stage, medication is given to shut down or "quiet" the ovarian function. This induced rest period allows the ovaries to respond better to hormonal stimulation. Also, suppressing the natural ovulatory cycle keeps the body from recruiting a single dominant follicle during the induced cycle, allowing for the maturation of multiple eggs.

Well, I am considered lucky that I do not need to do the lupron injection which will be given instead of Nasal Spray in some other countries. ;P However. the side effects of all suppression medications are all the same. Their symptoms are similar to women who are going into menopause like mood swings/breast tenderness/hot flashes/headaches/changes in sex drive etc.

I will continue the medication till 3rd day of my next menses which will be probably take another 10-12 days. Then I will do a blood test to confirm that my Estrogen level is suppressed and soon after, I will be starting the stimulation stage. :)

Frozen Embryo Transfer - Failed

Went for the HCG blood test this morning, we called back at 1245pm and the result was NEGATIVE.

Yes. I am NOT pregnant. The Frozen Embryo Transfer failed....

J and I were of course disappointed but I guessed we took it very well. Frankly, I don't have much confidence from the moment I know that only 1 out of 6 embryos survived. I am not so disappointed today maybe because I got a Negative when I took the pregnancy test yesterday morning. Moreover, the hope was almost crashed when I start spotting last evening.

Well, I believed even the gynea couldn't give me a reason. They are just tons of reasons why it wouldn't work. Anyway, J will call him this afternoon to book for an appt to discuss about the whole issue. Sigh... not really interested to listen due to the language barrier. Maybe we will also discuss about when we will start a FRESH IVF cycle.

As for now, I am looking forward going to Paris on Friday to meet my sister. We might extend one more day in Paris to bring our dear Shannon to Paris Disneyland. :)

3 Days To Go

3 More Days to Go!!!

Well, it seems to be short but look damn long to me. How should I spend my 3 days to make it shorter??? Argghh..I have been thinking of POAS (Pee On A Stick) but worrying see only one line appearing at the test.

Well, I think I can take it even if it is unsuccessful but the fear of going thru the whole farking IVF procedures totally freak me out.

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Imagine, I will look like a drug addict sniffing the nasal spray for about half a month.



Then becoming a pin cusion taking daily injection for another half a month.



Worst part is the Egg Retrieval Procedures. My gynea FORGOT to book me an anesthesia previously that cause me great pain and cramp during the procedure. Finally the embryo transfer and another 2 stressful week waiting for the result.

I am still quite upset about the result of thawed embyros. Only ONE survived and transfered which make me no choice but to go thru the whole IVF procedure if failed this time. How I wish I could stop at ONE. I am contented having my little Shannon but worried that she will be alone in the world without any brother and sister if we passed away one day. Contradicting ya?

Waiting Game Begins

I have one embryo transferred this morning. The Biologist said she had made a mistake this morning on the numbers of embryos being thawed. They thawed total of 6 embryos and only ONE survived which mean NO blastocyst stage embryo was cultivated. The biologist said the quality of this embryo was good and had "high potential" to succeed. Thus, I am having a 3 days embryo in my uterine cavity now, implantation will probably happen 2-3 days later. (Finger crossed)

Dr. Lechat said I can "live normally" after the transfer. I doesn't need bed rest and can resume daily activities right away. She mentioned that there is no scientific result that showed bed-rest increase the rate of implantation. I will have the first blood test on 3 December and 6 December to confirm whether I am pregnant.In other words, I have no frozen embryo left. If I am not pregnant this time, I will need to go thru the Full IVF procedures again which can be quite torturing. I dare not have too much hope too because I am down with bad cough now which I already anticipated before the whole thing started. Dr Lechat said I couldn't take any medicine now except for Panadol which mean I am going to cough my lungs out. :( . "Sigh" Anyway, it was really "suay" to get it now and hopefully my immune system doesn't affect the success rate of the implantation.

SINGLE EMBYRO TRANSFER

I called the this morning and the biologist said that 1 embryo survived out of 4 embryos!!! And I will be doing the embryo transfer 1.5hr later!!!!

Wish me luck!!!